The Spiritual Combat: CONCERNING THE ASSAULT OF DESPAIR AND ITS REMEDY
THE SECOND ASSAULT by which the perverse one attempts our
destruction is the terror which he would infuse into our minds at the
recollection of our past sins, hoping thereby to drive us to despair.
In this peril, hold fast to the infallible rule that the
remembrance
of your sins is the effect of grace, and is most salutary if it
inspires within your heart sentiments of humility, compunction, and
confidence in God's mercy. But if such recollection creates vexation
and despondency, leaving you spiritless from the apparent cogency of
the reasons adduced to convince you that you are irrevocably lost, be
assured that it has been suggested by the devil. In such circumstances,
humble yourself the more, and have greater confidence in God; thus
shall you destroy the strategem of the devil, turn his own weapons
against him, and give greater glory to God.It is true that you should be truly contrite for having offended such sovereign goodness, as often as you call to mind your past offenses; but as often as you ask pardon you should have a firm confidence in the infinite mercy of Jesus Christ.
I will go further and say that even though God Himself should seem to say within your heart that you are not one of His flock, still place your confidence in Him; rather say to Him in all humility: "Thou hast good reason indeed, O Lord, to condemn me for my sins, but I have greater reason in Thy mercy to hope for pardon. Have pity then, O Lord, on a humble sinner condemned by his own sinfulness, but redeemed by Thy Blood. I commit myself entirely to Thy hands, O my Redeemer; all my hopes are in Thee, trusting that in Thine infinite compassion, Thou will save me to the glory of Thy name. Do with me as Thou wilt, for Thou alone art my Lord. Even though, My Lord, Thou shouldst destroy me, ever will I hope in Thee."