POEM: The Hell of Loving

POEM:  The Hell of Loving

By: Eric Gajewski

"If I wait hell is my house, and I have made my bed in darkness."
[Job 17:13]

Please enjoy and share my latest poem from the work, Fortress of the Soul"

Press play and listen as you read along 

Have Ye ever gazed uponst Love’s Face?

Bruised and swollen with bones battered

And flesh ripped out of place

O’ the soul’s in hell know this suffering’s “weight”

And the same await all those in the dark which controls those in mortal sin

For hell’s fire they can not escape; death shalst be there fate

And the Militant above in the “dark night’

As well certainly know this agonizing state

For the weak soul unaccustomed to the Light shalst think he is a disgrace

O’ in this hell of loving,

The Self must be carved out of a soul

That He might alone occupy this same space

Blinded by the brilliant Light of Love

It seems as though a man is lost in a dark maze

Whilst the many ponder not the price that Love paid

And the few, of His life, trace

Following that he might be saved

O’ Love endured hell that it might see you through

In the soul’s endless fight

For before any eagle can take to flight

He must have Faith and Hope to reach the skies above so blue

For Love’s road at first shall seem to take a man “out of his way”

So that a man can forget himself; so that from self will he will turn away

And as coal is crushed so must a man get acquired to suffering’s taste

For the Furnace of His Sacred Heart rages hot

His all consuming Fire can never retire

And in the soul "alive" God can never show up late

For the hell of loving in this dark night shall have its day

But as we grow and continue to go inward and pray

A spark shalst appear within

As a man now notice’s his labor was not in vain

O’ the hell of loving is leading us!

Weary soldier, look ahead, there is still much more to gain

And with each pile of wood thrown into this Fire

A soul begins to notice on the surface this great change

For man is but nothing and that which he seeks is Someone altogether Great

Nay, man must endure all hell’s anquish

He must too descend into Sheol and embrace all the pain

For to live I must die

With every nerve on strain

Nigh, this Fire must be allowed to purify

Wilst keeping the clouds of despair denied

So that self’s tears down come down upon the soul as rain

For if I live howst can He in me be?

Did He not exclaim that in this world, His Head,

Hath no place to lay?

Therefore, this short term of the “hell of loving”

Must be exchanged for Faith

That a man prepare his soul for the Beloved’s long term stay

For in the end suffering is no more

As soul’s rest as One with the Fire and Light, the Christ

Wherein we shall forever praise His Holy Name

For the man who truly loves Christ

Will also love holy suffering

And after this period of the hell of loving

He shalst arise illuminated and never be the same

Why then talk about Love

As you run from the cross wilst trying so earnestly to explain?

Yea, what good does it do to talk about Love

That Ye knowest not

When ye reject the only key to your heart, the Cross

Which alone can only unlock?

For those that Love shall walk with suffering feet

Behold, He that first grows in Love

Will likewise grow in the same degree in grief

Yea, like a withering leaf!

I feel as though I fall into hell far beneath

Trampled upon by doubt, fear, worry and anxiety

But this is how, in the autumn of the soul, it first must be

For He is preparing thee for the souls’ endless Spring

And, unless a soul, see himself in humility, as a nothing

He will continually howl out into the night

Unseen and silently…

In this dark of the “hell of loving”

"The sorrows of hell encompassed me: and the snares of death prevented me."
[Psalms 17:6]

"Who is the man that shall live, and not see death: that shall deliver his soul from the hand of hell?"
[Psalms 88:49]

"Unless the Lord had been my helper, my soul had almost dwelt in hell."
[Psalms 93:17]

"The sorrows of death have encompassed me: and the perils of hell have found me. I met with trouble and sorrow:"
[Psalms 114:3]

"Though they go down even to hell, thence shall my hand bring them out: and though they climb up to heaven, thence will I bring them down."
[Amos 9:2] 

"And he said: I cried out of my affliction to the Lord, and he heard me: I cried out of the belly of hell, and thou hast heard my voice."
[Jonas (Jonah) 2:3]

Questions, comments and suggestions? Email me at apostleofmary@hotmail.com

Donations: Please get behind TradCatKnight financially if you feel you have benefited from the material I present.  I appreciate all your prayers and support!  I also appreciate the letters coming in as well!  For CASH contributions please email me at apostleofmary@hotmail.com for the mailing address.